A preparation programme for raising a child and building the bond. A preparation programme for raising a child and building the bond — age periods, stages of development, psychological barriers.
A parent repeats the model brought from childhood. A parent repeats the model from their own childhood. Seeing it is the first condition for changing it.
Most of a child’s behaviour is not a parenting mistake but an age norm — the parent simply does not know what that age demands. A “disobedient” three-year-old is going through autonomy, while a “withdrawn” thirteen-year-old is looking for identity. The programme teaches this difference: which behaviour is a passing stage and which needs a specialist.
Every age has its own task, its own crisis and perception. Every age has its own task, its own crisis and its own way of perceiving — understand a child by age
A child learns whether the world is safe not from words but from whether the parent responds. The attachment formed here becomes the template for every later relationship.
“Me myself!” and “no!” are not stubbornness but a test of one’s own will. Too much control here breeds shame and doubt; total freedom prevents any sense of a boundary.
The child takes initiative, plays roles and learns rules through play. The line between imagination and reality is still thin — a “lie” is usually not a lie. Guilt-based parenting does its damage precisely here.
School starts measuring a child by results. If failure is not accompanied properly, the belief “I can’t” takes hold. Compare not with another child, but with the child’s own result yesterday.
The body changes fast and the peer group’s opinion outweighs the parent’s. Sharp emotional swings are normal here; the warning sign is lasting isolation and loss of interests.
A teenager looks for the answer to “who am I” by separating from the parent. Conflict here is a necessary process — the goal is not to suppress it but to get through it safely.
Read the signal behind behaviour before you punish. Read the signal behind behaviour — long before punishing or frightening
Refusing nursery, school or bedtime is usually not laziness but separation fear. Denying the fear strengthens it; step-by-step separation dissolves it.
What a child cannot put into words, they show through behaviour. Behind aggression there is usually helplessness, jealousy or not being heard.
Shyness and the stance “I can’t do it”. Confidence grows when praise goes to effort rather than result — a simple, proven correction.
A constant “no” usually grows from blurred boundaries. A child needs a boundary — stable, known in advance and independent of mood.
Indifference to schoolwork is rarely laziness. Underneath lies fear of failure, conflict with a teacher or class, sometimes an attention disorder.
A new child in the family is not only joy but also an experience of loss. Equal treatment does not mean equal time — each child needs to be recognised separately.
A child repeats not what is said, but what is seen. A child repeats not what is said but what is seen — the parent’s model is far stronger than words
A parent unknowingly repeats the parenting model brought from their own family. The first step is to name that model.
A calm parent means a calm child. The ability to handle your own anger does more than any parenting technique.
When mother and father set different rules, the child learns the contradiction rather than the rule. An agreed position is the strongest parenting tool.
Demandingness and warmth do not exclude each other. The best outcome comes from a style where both are present at once.
Within family therapy: as a standalone course or as part of the therapy
The programme is led by clinical psychologist and family therapist Samira Rahimova. The Parents School can be taken as a standalone course or as part of the parent-child track of family therapy. If a behavioural disorder has already formed, the programme is combined with therapy — family and child therapy.
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